Now that I am a parent...

Nowadays,

I find it really hard to read about/see anything that has to do with children hurting or heaven forbid, getting killed. When we took Jaxon to be vaccinated, I could not even look at the lady giving him the shots. When he had to have blood drawn for his newborn screen, I had to avert my eyes and cringe. And I used to be the one in her shoes, doing all of that without even batting an eyelid! Setting i/v lines in tiny hands/arms, drawing blood, putting in feeding tubes etc. Now when I think of those things, I feel kinda sick. For one thing, it means somebody's child is sick or unwell ...for another thing, medical procedures HURT!

I get free subscriptions to several magazines geared at parents, and I was reading one article tonight about ways that a child could be prevented from drowning, which was the 2nd leading cause of death in children, after motor vehicle accidents. It was hard for me to continue reading on, after they started out with the real story of a family that lost a toddler to drowning. I began to feel so anxious I had to stop reading. Your heart breaks more easily when you're a mom, I suppose, and you want to do anything and everything within your power to make sure your little one is safe.

I know David shares my feelings somewhat because he can get very protective of Jaxon, and watches him silently at night and puts his hand on the baby's chest to make sure he is breathing, and it makes his heart jump if Jaxon happens to gasp in his sleep. In the words of the man himself, "I hate it that I love him so much".

I know, honey. I understand.